Wednesday, 16 September 2009

The HammockSource - The Comfort Compromise

I just received the September issue of Casual Living Magazine, "the voice of the leisure marketplace."

On page 36 begins the article by Cinde W. Ingram:

"The HammockSource transforms backyards around the world."

The HammockSource has indeed altered the way hammocks are sold in America and around the world. However . . .

Here are some misleading factoids from the article:

"South Carolina riverboat captain Josh Ward essentially reinvent(ed) the hammock, crafting a more stable and comfortable lattice-like woven hammock design and adding a wooden spreader bar where none had been before."

Let's break down this absurdly false sentence:

1. "Josh Ward essentially reinvented the hammock..." - FALSE. Cap'n Josh made a lazy sketch of a hammock with a rope cargo net from his boat, and he wasn't the first to do it.

2. "...creating a more stable and (more) comfortable lattice-like woven hammock design..."
FALSE. Anyone who has a basic understanding of physics knows that the bars create tension along a central line that makes the hammock "tippy," or UNSTABLE. Authentic hammocks, without wood spreaders, are supremely stable, as any reasonably educated hammock user knows.

The gaping weave in Josh Ward's rope hammock is not more comfortable than anything that pre-dated his "creation." The "lattice-like woven hammock design" is certainly not attributable to Josh Ward. Superbly comfortable, authentic Mayan hammocks predated Cap'n Josh by at least 900 years!

3. "...and adding a wooden spreader where none had been before."
FALSE as evidenced below:

This engraving (available on Wikipedia), from 1630,
predates Josh Ward by 259 years:

Theodor_Galle_after_Johannes_Stradanus.PNG‎ (744 × 551 pixels, file size: 543 KB, MIME type: image/png)

Here you see that "hammocks," with wood spreaders and lattice like weaving were "created" centuries before Josh Ward came along.

Josh Ward may have inspired the Pawleys Island Hammock Company, but he was an imitator not an innovator.

Captain Josh Ward was not even the first lazy rigger to install wood bars in his "hammock." He merely copied a bad copy.

Weaving comfort into a hammock is an art form. The art of comfort takes time, and a great deal of skill and patience that Captain Josh Ward wasn't willing to apply 120 years ago.

Josh Ward's "contribution" to the hammock world is a romanticized bit of fiction - authored by The HammockSource, a company built on propaganda.

"A sign inside the company's 280,000 sq.-ft. plant in Greenville, N.C., speaks to its underlying philosophy: Quality is when our customers come back and our products don't"

The high number of disappointed HammockSource customers coming to us as a result of this "philosophy," underscores their compromise between durability and comfort.

Our philosophy: Transcendent Comfort defines a hammock.

The primary function of a hammock is to provide COMFORT - religious, transcendent, COMFORT.

If you lay in a hammock and say - "
Oh my God, this is HEAVENLY ...ABSOLUTELY WONDERFUL!" you are definitely not in a hammock from The HammockSource.

The HammockSource builds hammocks that can be made quickly, for a great profit, subtracting the time and effort required to build comfort into their designs. Making hammocks from materials that are impervious to weather is a fine concept, but it is not feasible beyond a certain point without compromising comfort.

The HammockSource sells us a ride without transporting us.

There are half a dozen photos on page 36 of the article - showing hammocks in various stages of production at their plant in Greenville, N.C., and yet no mention of the fact that the majority of The HammockSource product is made in China(and has been for the last decade).

This is the very reason we are now weathering the worst flood of sub-standard goods in the history of the hammock.

The main character of the real shammock saga is Mr. Perkins. It's obvious that he worked hard to build his business, is a businessman, and he is respected for that accomplishment.

However, the premise that he has done something positive for the world of comfort and leisure is wholly false.

According to the Casual Living article, Mr. Perkins began his career selling cigarettes, a product well-known as a leading cause of death and discomfort around the world.

He moved up to selling another popular product that conveys the image of comfort without providing any, the Rope Hammock.

The marketing skill and business savvy required to pull this off with a straight face is somewhat beyond my imagination, but nonetheless impressive and extremely lucrative.

The article ends with a statement from CEO Walter Perkins III

"It's hard to argue with success."

That it is, Walter... however,

We define success in terms of values like truth and comfort, not dollars.

I disagree with the premise of your article, and with the misleading self promotion that has caused so many people to suffer lost comfort, even loss of life, for the sake of your profits.

History will show the "success" of The HammockSource as trendsetters in a near obliteration of the comfort standard in the hammock market, and a temporary whitewashing of The Comfort Compromise.

Casual Living, once again spotlights a loyal advertiser with an in-depth "Company Report" masqueraded as journalism. Bravo.

Wednesday, 9 September 2009

Panama Hammocks medium Hammock

You could grab a sheet off your bed and tie it between two trees and achieve the same effect.

OR, you could pay $64.99 at Hayneedle for a hammock they sourced at under $6 - and sweat your backside off while layin under those trees.

It's a GREAT deal, and there's lots more to choose from at Hayneedle - your shammock superstore:

Panama Hammocks Medium Hammock – Pepper | Chairs and Hammocks
Imagine a warm summer evening gazing up at the stars. Wouldn't this be an awesome way to do that? The Panama Hammocks Medium Hammock - Red is perfectly.

Friday, 4 September 2009

You don't know Jack

Jack cites a main disadvantage of hammock chairs, as if they are all made alike; that you can't put your feet up. Nonsense! What Jack is trying to say is that shammock chairs lack the space to put your feet up. He goes on to discuss various types of shammocks with no sense of his own ignorance, whatever:

Garden Hammocks. What to consider? Stand type, Farbic Type?
By Jack
You must ensure that you buy the right stand for your choice of hammock, a chair hammock for instance would require a very different stand from a traditional hammock. You must also consider things like whether your hammock has spread ...
Jacks Garden Store -

The best hammock chairs are comfortable enough to sleep in.

Trees vs. Hammock Stands

The IDIOTS who wrote the blog entry below recommended hammock stands in preference to trees citing improved hammock stability as a reason. Utter nonsense!

Trees are always the superior choice and hammock stability has to do with the wood spreader bars in the hammock, has nothing to do with the stand.

If you fall out of the tree, you will land on the ground.

If you fall out of a hammock hung on a conventional hammock stand you land on the metal bar beneath it.

What type of hammock would you recommend? | Hammock Chair Stands
By admin
I'm looking for a two person hammock, probably able to hold 500 pounds. It will be used outdoors. I'm looking for something with minimal maintenance yet.
Hammock Chair Stands -

HUGE hammock chair stand

It's a ridiculous waste of metal tubing - it takes the same space as a compact car:

Outback Chair Co. C-Frame Hammock Chair Stand | Chairs and Hammocks
By chairsandhammocks
What We Like About the C-Frame Hammock Chair StandThe C-Frame Hammock Chair Stand gives you the freedom to enjoy a hammock chair virtually anywhere. A.
Chairs and Hammocks -
Wonder why they don't show it in perspective to a human being in ANY of their pictures?

It's HUGE !
Read the Customer reviews!!


What more could you want?

Hammaka Parachute Portable Hammock | Chairs and Hammocks
Lightweight portable and big enough for two. What more could you want?The Hammaka Portable Parachute Hammock is constructed of the highest quality.

Thursday, 3 September 2009

Bad Mojo Hammock Chair

This is truly one of the most horrid, uncomfortable contraptions on the hammock chair market:

Kingcord Bouganville Forest Green Hammock Chair W Forest Green Cushion
By admin
Aluminum Tripod Frame w Natural Tan Hammock Chair & Wood Dowels Kingcord Bouganville X-Large Deluxe Hammock- Natural Beige. Hammaka Hammock Chair Tripod Stand Forest Green w Wood Dowels. The Kingcord Bouganville Forest Green Hammock ...
Mentored -

Wednesday, 2 September 2009

Keep your day job, Mark

Thanks, but you aren't qualified to write about this subject.
Rope hammocks are NOT comfortable, no matter how you spin it.

How to choose a Hammock | All Set
By Mark
But as popularity has grown, some manufacturers have created stand-alone hanging systems which enable you to move your hammock chair into more open areas. They are also much more stable and might be a good option for use by children or ...
All Set -

Another content mercenary paid to type words that doesn't comport with reality.

Ginormous hammock chair stands

Come on folks, if you want a hammock chair stand that takes the same amount of space as a compact car - this one from hayneedle/ is for you:

#1 Selling Handmade Mayan Hammock Chair! | Chairs and Hammocks
By chairsandhammocks
The ultimate seat for all ages shapes and sizes. This comfy hammock chair hangs from a 40-inch sturdy wood bar and features easy single-point attachment.
Chairs and Hammocks -
Convert the single point hammock chairs, like the one featured above, to a dual point hammock chair.


Dual point hammock chairs are safer.
Dual point hammock chair stands take a minimum of space.
Dual point hammock chair stands are small enough to use indoors.
Dual point hammock chair stands require no tools for assembly.
Dual point hammock chair stands cost less.
Dual point hammock chair stands look classy.

XCHAIR and HAMX2GO™ comprise a dual point hammock chair system.

PALAPA™ is a dual point hammock chair that seats 6 people.

If you buy a single point hammock chair, odds are you can still fix it and make it better. Most can be converted.

Choosing the Perfect Hammock

Well, the title is nice, but . . .

the people who wrote it are paid content mercenaries with no concept of comfort, or how you should go about choosing a comfortable hammock.

Shammock perpetrators-beware:

Choosing the Perfect Hammock
Many people envision a lazy afternoon of rhythmic swaying as they enjoy the world of nature from within the confines of the perfect hammock.

Have a comfortable relaxation . . .

It makes me laugh, but it's really sad!

Who writes this ridiculous drivel?

Outdoor hammocks | Garden Decor
By BeautifulGarden
Have a comfortable relaxation in your own backyard while listening to a soothing music. You will have a more pampering morning or afternoon when you lie in an.
Garden Decor -

People who sell you rope hammocks, and paid content bloggers with a 6th grade education, that's who.

Leisure Hammocks - "Have a comfortable relaxation..." - enjoy their sham mockery of comfort.

Island Bay XL Rope Hammock with Metal Stand Ultimate Set

Here is or "hayneedle" as they are now called - the ultimate online shammock site promoting their house brand shammock, Island Bay XL Rope Hammock.

Offering you the ultimate shammock experience.

Island Bay XL Rope Hammock with Metal Stand Ultimate Set | Chairs ...
By chairsandhammocks
We guarantee our Island Bay Rope hammocks will give you the ultimate hammock experience. An extremely high quality and high comfort hammock the Island Bay.
Chairs and Hammocks -

Sure, you can trust them.